First off, today I am grateful that I am sticking to my guns about keeping up on my gratitude journal. I also am grateful that after work today, I took the time to take care of myself. I feel like I have been so on the go ever since my roommate moved in along with trying to keep myself busy to keep some boys off my mind. Today I came home exhausted from work. I had been drinking coffee and struggling to stay peppy all day for the youngins, but it was quite taxing to stay upbeat after two bottles of wine and a Blackhawks loss with my friend the night before. I am grateful that I got through the day and was able to come home and take an amazingly refreshing nap. My body definitely needed that, and I am glad I gave into the urge.
After my nap I had a good chill sesh with my roomie and got to catch up on a guilty pleasure of mine The Real World (I know, I know).. It was nice to just kick it. After feeling better about myself after witnessing all the ridiculous reality TV drama, I was feeling productive and ready to accomplish some things. I am grateful I decided to make my lunch for work tonight. It was nice being able to cook up my taco salad peacefully tonight rather than rushing around tomorrow before work. After making my future lunch, I relaxed by putting on an herbal clay face mask and just detoxifying for fifteen minutes. I am feeling so rejuvenated and content right now.
Overall, I am so grateful to have started working on maintaining happiness, inner love, and peace rather than seeking finding happiness, love, peace in other people. I am starting to see how such small mundane tasks done out of love for yourself can make you feel so good about yourself, and I am grateful to not be running around after work to go meet up with a boy who expects me to take care of his needs over my own. It has been a long time coming, but this recurring realization has finally seemed to sink in, and I am proud to say I am putting self-love above any other romantic love right now. It’s going to be hard and every day will be different, but I need to put myself first right now in order to be able to fully and healthily love someone else down the road. Very thankful to be growing.